Godey's Lady's Book

GODEY'S LADY'S BOOK
Philadelphia, February 1850

OUR POST-MISTRESS; OR, WHY SHE WAS TURNED OUT.

You've no doubt heard the important fact that our amiable post-mistress, who has had charge of the mails (not males) in the village of —— (no, I won't let you publish the name), for the last ten years, has been removed. As all removals, under the present administration, are " for cause, " of course there was a cause for the removal of Mrs.——And now I am going to let you into a little secret touching the matter.

Colonel L —– has a pretty daughter; and our young representative in Congress, Edward R —–, has taken quite a fancy to her. Well, last February, when the whole village was agog about Valentines, R —– was seen, by the post-mistress, who was glancing from the window, to deposit a letter in the box; and something in his manner satisfied her that it was a missive of more than usual importance. Curiosity prompted her to look at the superscription of the letter, when it was found to be directed to Miss Flora L –—.

" It isn't hard to understand the meaning of that, " said Mrs. ——to herself, with a quiet smile of satisfaction.

Not long after, while the post-mistress was assorting and stamping the letters preparatory to closing the mail, a tall spinster, and a short, fat, plump maiden in her teens, came in to see and hear what was to be seen and heard,

" This is Valentine's Day, " said the tall spinster, Miss Sprogle by name, as she sat herself down on the edge of a chair, and looked, with a curiosity not to be concealed, at the pile of letters on the table beside the post-mistress.

" Yes, I believe it is, " replied Mrs.—— " Lots of love-letters, I s'pose? " Miss Sprogle wriggled herself impatiently.

" Yes, I rather guess there are a few, " said Mrs. ——with a knowing twinkle.

" Are these Valentines? " and Miss Sprogle came over to the table, and laid her hand on a pile of letters.

" Here is one, I know, " replied the post-mistress, whose usual discreetness was leaving her.

" Oh, let me see it! " and the spinster snatched the letter from her hand. " This is a real Valentine, then Let me see —'To Miss Flora L ——.' O dear, goodness me! and it's to Flora. I wonder who sent it. Do you know? "

" I can guess, " returned Mrs.—— " Who? who? "

Mrs. –—shook her head.

" Ah, do tell; just tell me. I'll never whisper a word of it – not a word. You can trust me, you know. I'm a woman that can sleep a secret. "

" I'm most afraid. It might get me into trouble. It was mere accident that I saw him drop it in the box. "

" Who? who? " was eagerly inquired.

Mrs.——hesitated.

" Come, now, that's a dear, good soul. Just tell me and Lizzy, and we'll never breathe a word of it. Will we, Lizzy? "

" No, indeed, " replied the fat girl; " that we won't. "

" Well, I'll just tell you in confidence, " said the post-mistress, thus urged; " in the strictest confidence. I saw Edward R —– drop it in. "

" R –—! Ah, ha! he's after Miss Flora, is he? " Miss Sprogle's face was instantly all animation. " I wonder what's in it?. " was added, in a moment after; and up went the letter to her curious eyes For some time, she eagerly sought to connect in sentences the written words she saw. At length, she began reading aloud, turning the letter from side to side in her hand as she progressed: –

" Lovely Flora! gentle lady!: Winning hearts where'er thy smile
Glances, like a sunbeam falling: On some lonely, desert isle.
I now pledge thee life and fortune,: Offer all 1 hold most dear;
Swear no thought –— "

Beyond this, Miss Sprogle could not go, try as she would to trace the lines concealed by the envious folds of the paper.

" That's pretty nice, isn't it? " said she, as the letter was withdrawn from her eyes. " Lovely Flora! sunbeams! swearing, and all that. Let me look at it again, " and the lines were scanned a second time.

On the next day, it was known all over the village that Flora L –—had received a Valentine from the young M. C., and that the verse above quoted was in it. How Miss Sprogle came by her intelligence on the subject she was prudent enough to keep to herself; but her fat friend Lizzy was not so discreet; she told a very particular friend the whole story of Miss Sprogle's spying into the Valentine; and she told her particular friend, who happened to be living in Mr. R –—'s family; and she, in turn, told R –—'s sister, who told him.

Of course, R –— was as angry as a reasonable man ought to have been under the circumstances; and vowed, on the spot, that the post-mistress should be turned out. And, sure enough, before two months went by, an order for her removal was received; and she resigned her post, though with rather a bad grace. No reason for the removal being given by the Department, Mrs. — declares hers to be a case of proscription for opinion's sake, she being opposed in politics to the administration. Whether she has really guessed at the true reason, we know not; but when she reads this she will be no longer in doubt.

So now you know why our post-mistress was removed.

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